Last week was hard! I did a lot of self reflection and I didn’t like what I seen! I seen exactly who the world wanted me to see and that has to change. Let me explain.
There is something about a new year that brings out a feeling inside of you. For me it’s always been reflection. It’a been this way for the last 5 years. I don’t know if it’s because I am in downtime awaiting for the spring rush or is it something else. But when I reflect it always starts out with me being so hard on myself. I point out all of my flaws and where I have done wrong but it ends up with me throwing myself a pity party and it’s not a fun party ever! I start out doing exactly what I or anyone else shouldn’t do, GET on social media and there you see everyone’s perfect lives ￼and for me I am over here thinking My life sometimes is a flying Hot mess, it’s far from perfect! My house looks like a tornado has went through, my sleeping habits have been screwed up for over 2 years, I am literally not sleeping or when I do, I sleep too much. I am not eating right or taking care of myself but by George no one will ever know the real struggle (insert perfect family photo on social media) then on top of that I see all of these other photographers who’s business are booming and I think what have they got that I don't have? I always show up and give 200% of myself I take pride in producing images that are beautiful,I am very nice and I will do anything and everything I can to help you but yet I feel like a failure. WHY? Why do I do this myself. Well I will tell you why! I am human and I am not perfect. I am trying to pretend that I am. I wear my heart on my sleeve and that’s OK but I will not be fake anymore! It’s time to drop this whole “I am Perfect” ￼persona on social media and let’s get really real! Let’s get real with life and start living it for REAL. We live in a world where the mentality is I gotta knock you down in order for me to be lifted up. Well Jina is not going to be a part of that crap any longer. You are not better than me and I am not better than you! Period! I am about to be a real as I possible can and I will show you me and my real life trying to be a ￼business owner/entrepreneur￼ in a small town. It’s hard and it can be very frustrating but it’s also the best Job I could have ever wished for myself. God opened doors for me that in my opinion should have never opened up but here I am almost 10 years in and doing what I love! I have met the most amazing people and clients who have literally turned into friends and some like family. It’s so rewarding! 2020 is going to be bigger and better and I am ready! This will be a year of giving back to the ones who poured so graciously into me.
Thank you all for allowing me to be real! Now let’s get to work!